Here’s a portrait of my friend and college roommate Gnat, a poet/queer activist/artist/organic food sorter in Vancouver. She couldn’t come to the weddings, but wrote our vows and a community blessing for the ceremony in Maine. I sent her Amy Lowell’s To a Husband and Frank O’Hara’s A la recherche de Gertrude Stein (this from Erica); she sent me Lorna Crozier’s Finally, Mary Oliver’s Wild Geese and Meditation at Lagunitas by Robert Hass. Then she sent me the vows, which were so good that I changed exactly two words. Her ideas, in short: honouring bodies, love’s changing shapes/seasons, and holding while letting go. The only thing missing was the word ‘heteropatriarchy,’ but we knew it was there in spirit. Thank you Gnat, I love you.